Time Stops (and The Elation of Submission Success)

NO.

Ever since I started my pursuit as a writer almost three years ago, I've been told "no" almost as much as when I was a little kid, begging for unwarranted toys or candy in a store.

Of course, it never comes across so bluntly as a simple En-Oh. It's usually something along the lines of "Thank you for sharing this with us, but unfortunately we don't believe your story is quite right for us..." Either it's something like that, or in many cases, there's no response at all. But however it's said (or not said), it all still means "No".

Now, I understand agencies and publishers aren't out to dash my dreams. I know they're extremely busy and can't respond to everything personally. I also haven't been in this game very long, and haven't been rejected nearly as much many of my other fellow aspiring authors. But simply put, being told "no", time after time, sucks.

But then someone says "yes"...

A few months ago, while I was waiting to hear back from an agency regarding my revised manuscript for Sons of Sludge (which ended up resulting in another "no") I was at a loss for how I should proceed in the meantime. I've always heard people encouraging writers to never stop writing, but I wasn't quite sure about what to write. My wife suggested that I work on some short stories while I passed the time, and the product of this endeavor was two short tales about teenagers with reject superpowers.

After I finished the first one, Time Stops, I sent it to a handful of literary journals, not expecting much more to come from it, other than the standard rejections I was so used to receiving. And while I did receive some, one particular website sent an email that had never before graced my eyes. They actually said yes. I'd just lost my submission acceptance virginity. And it felt good.

Lunch Ticket, an online literary journal from the MFA community of Antioch University Los Angeles, will be featuring Time Stops in their December issue, which can be viewed HERE. I hope you enjoy it!

And what of my other writing endeavours? While I rejoice in this small victory, my work in the world of literature (or whatever you deem my stories as) is far from over. I've submitted my other short story, The Taxidermist's Daughter, to some journals, hoping to start a winning streak after this isolated incident. I've also sent revised queries for Sons of Sludge to some agents. If nothing comes from that, there's an online novel contest next year that might prove interesting. But whatever the case, this isn't the last you will hear from Josiah Upton, the Amateur Writing Bandit!

And to all my friends and family, thank you for your support. Many of you have expressed enjoyment in my writing in the past, and now having a complete stranger say it's worthy to be read by other complete strangers only affirms your sentiments. I hope to never disappoint you!

Hello Again

Yes, I'm still alive!

Sorry for the enormous break in updates, folks, but I assure you, I have been keeping busy... by waiting. Lots and lots of waiting. Let me give you the skinny on what's been going on the past 6 months:

As you may recall, my last post described the despondency of getting rejected by an opportunity that felt like a sure thing. What I neglected to tell you, however, was that the rejecting literacy agency in question did give me glimmer of hope within said rejection. While they generally liked my original manuscript for Sons of Sludge, they turned it down because of issues they had with it's ending, but expressed interest in seeing it again, in the event that I revised it.

And so that's what I did. I took a few months to revise the manuscript, changing the ending to what I thought might assuage the agent's concerns, and resubmitted it to them. Then I waited. And waited. Surely they would end up offering me representation, right? After all the work I put in, just for them?

Well, they didn't. For whatever reason (because they really didn't give me a specific reason), they said "no" again. And this time, that glimmer of hope was AWOL in the rejection. The door is now completely shut. It's extremely aggravating, putting that much time and energy into a dead-end, but I guess that's just the way the industry works. I knew that - more or less - going into this.

And it wasn't a complete loss. I believe my revised manuscript is better than the original, and it has now taken the place as the official copy.

But now what?

Though I'm not too optimistic, and I dread the process, there's still some options to scrape up from the bottom of the literary agent barrel. I can re-query agents that turned me down before, this time offering the revised manuscript. I know it's a long shot, but it's something.

And I promise you, Sons of Sludge WILL be available to read. I suspect it will be rather soon, too, unless by some miracle an agent responds positively, which would further delay its release (ugh). But either way, just like my Undead protagonist Zaul, this story isn't finished with life yet.

While I was waiting, I also wrote a couple of short stories, for a series I am tentatively calling "16 & Strange". TIME STOPS is about a completely paralyzed boy who can freeze time once a day, and THE TAXIDERMIST'S DAUGHTER is about a girl who can experience the lives of dead animals when she lays her hand on them. I may make these little nuggets available for you to read in the near future, so check back now and then.

Also, Float is once again available for free on Amazon, for today and tomorrow only. If you've never downloaded it, or know somebody else who should, now is the perfect opportunity to support your local independent author achieve his small-scale dreams. And if you REALLY love me, and have already read Float, leave a quick review for it on Amazon. This would help me more than you can imagine.

You'll hear from me soon, friends.

Publication Woes

If only finding representation were as easy for me as for a rapper's hometown.

I know, I know... It's been almost four months since my last post, the biggest gap ever in the now one year history of this blog. I know my readers are few, and somewhere small in the back of their minds, a dying gasp of a whisper itches at them to check for an update. The itch goes unheeded. And, to be honest, I've barely thought about this blog myself. 

There are other things on my mind. Namely, the wretched process that is prying one's way into the publishing world. Hoping their polished turd of a book (or at least it feels that way sometimes) will reach beyond the realm of their friends and family. To one day see their work in print, and not because you paid someone to print it.

The first stage - writing the damn thing - I finished at the end of the year. The month of January was spent editing and polishing the aforementioned turd to the best of my ability, and letting a few family members read it. Only positive things were said.

But all that was the easy part. The next step was to find a literary agent to represent my work to a major publisher. SPOILER ALERT: I haven't.

I sent out a wave of email queries to a number of agencies, expecting either rejections, or nothing at all. But, within the first day of my search, an agent requested my first 50 pages! Needless to say I was quite excited, especially since no such luck was found after querying for months with Float. 

Then, they asked for the full manuscript. I was awestruck. Periodic feedback was very positive, and my tower of hopes kept building higher and higher. It felt like such a sure deal, that in no time negotiations would be made with a big publishing house to get Sons of Sludge on the shelves. I had the chilled bubbly on standby at all times.

But then, my tower of hopes was smeared with the very turd it was built upon, then knocked over into the mud. And more turds. The agency ended up declining my book.

And now I'm back to square one. Actually, square negative one, as I have less agents to query than when I started. It's quite depressing.

I jest when I say Sons of Sludge is a turd. I actually think it is very good, worthy of print and readership and accolades. And, though I am aware of my personal bias, I believe it to be better than some books already in print, even on some best-seller lists. But what good is that if an agent, much less a publishing company, doesn't feel the same way? I know it's all just part of the game, but sometimes playing the game sucks.

But I guess I shouldn't complain too much. I haven't been at it for too long, where other fellow authors having been searching for an agent for years. And, like them, I won't give up. Thanks for hearing me vent, and hopefully, the next time I post, it'll be that good news every budding author dreams of.

Finally...

Please excuse me while I do a little happy dance, because the first draft for my next novel, Sons of Sludge, is finally complete.

You may recall a little post I made back in May, in which I came to the depressing realization that the already 50,000+ words I had typed up had to be scrapped, in a favor of a more (I think) successful direction and restructuring. Well, put those 50,000+ words alongside the recently completely 95,000+ word rewritten first draft, and you can safely bet I've had my fill of young adult Hybrid Reanimate literature composition.

Don't get me wrong - I love the story, and I think you will too, but it just feels like I've been grinding away at it for too long. Like... like being stuck in a room... with a person, who's... who's just...

Damn it. I can't even come up with a good simile/metaphor. I'm too mentally exhausted to pull it off.

But rest assured, this novel will see the light of day. The decision to overhaul the story will pay off in the editing process, because I'll have better material to work with. A higher quality of clay for my potter's wheel (Metaphor: Nailed it!). The first proofreading go-around will take the longest, with some chapter restructuring, plothole seeking and destroying, and the usual spelling, grammar and punctuation corrections. But even then, it shouldn't take too long. The third and fourth drafts will come even faster.

After the proofreading comes the most dreaded task: searching for literary representation. The manufactured query emails, the tedious contact list scanning, the inevitable impersonal rejections (or more often than not, no reply at all). I hate it. Every author does.

I had no such luck finding an agent to represent Float, but perhaps the premise was a little too obscure, a little too unbankable for an unpublished author. Sons of Sludge definitely has more marketing potential, but I'm still not too optimistic. Like with Float, if I can't find any success with traditional publishing, I will undoubtedly lose my patience and put it up independently on Amazon. Books are meant to be read, not sitting in a desk or on a hard drive, waiting for a deal that will never come.

Also, I feel I must clear the air about something, as a handful of people have brought a certain upcoming film based off of a book to my attention. I knew they would before they even did, as I became aware of said creative work shortly after starting to write my own story. Let me clarify:

Warm Bodies has an undead main character who craves human flesh. So does my book. This protagonist develops feelings for a human girl. So does mine.

The similarities stop there.

Zombies have become so pervasive in our pop culture over the last ten years that a zombie protagonist grappling with the traces of his/her/its remaining humanity was inevitable. My novel isn't the first, and it won't be the last. I don't claim that any of my work - past, present or future - is completely one-of-a-kind, and I don't mind sharing with other authors who have vaguely similar concepts. We all work with the same culture and human experiences. Are we good? Good.

With that out of the way, it's now time for more shameless self-promotion. As Christmas has just passed, some of you may know friends or family members who have recently been gifted a new Kindle, iPad, smartphone, etc. In light of this I am starting another free download campaign on Amazon for Float, effective Saturday and Sunday (29th and 30th). Spread the word, make some reading eyes happy.

Have a Happy New Year, and await my next update on Sons of Sludge with bated breath.

Spooky Blog Post From Beyond The Grave!!!

By "spooky" I mean "commonplace", and by "beyond the grave" I mean "the comfort of my office chair".

Happy Halloween! Tonight, through the magic of disguise, I will transform myself into Thor Odinson, donning a cheap blonde wig, a red blanket for a cape, and a $7 foam hammer intended for use by a toddler. For Asgard! Joining me will be my oldest son Teddy, dressed as the Incredible Hulk, my youngest Ozzy as Buzz Lightyear, and my lovely wife Jessica as sexy Pixar cowgirl Jessie. I'd say I can't wait to go trick-or-treating, but I've already dipped into the bag of chocolates a week ago - but that won't stop me from eating more tonight.

It's been one year since Clyde and his band competed in the Fright Night Band Fight, and 113 years away from the worst night of Zaul Jarreux's undead life.

I don't know why, but I must have a thing for putting Halloween events in my stories. I guess I'm fascinated by the holiday. When I was a very young child my family didn't celebrate Halloween, because the church we attended convinced us that the harmless, creative fantasy aspect of the holiday and its pagan origins were inseparable, and therefore the whole day was purely evil.

I remember turning off the light when any trick-or-treaters knocked on our door, pretending not to be home. I'm glad my parents' views changed and I was able to dress up and celebrate a few years later. One of my favorites is when my wife and I wore matching dresses, and me and my band played a show at my sister's house.

Aside from personal reflection, I'm also using this post to update goings-on with the above-mentioned Zaul and his adventures in my recent work in progress, Sons of Sludge. The first draft is roughly two thirds done, and the completion of this project couldn't come any sooner. I hope once I reread it, while editing for the first time, I can fall in love with the story and characters again, because I'm losing enthusiasm. I feel like I've been writing this forever. I'm planning to power through November and finish it by the end of the month, but who knows.

And once I complete a second or third draft, I'll start submitting it to literary agents. I think this story might have a better chance than Float at a traditional contract because it has a more mass appeal, what with zombies being all the rage with the youngsters nowadays. Then it's onto the Float sequel. I can't wait for everyone to read what I have coming for them!

Stay safe tonight - don't get tangled up with malicious musicians wielding magic instruments, and eat candy, not human flesh. Watch a scary movie or two.

Oh, and high-five to myself, for sneaking in an October post at the very end of the month. I almost didn't make it.

Misadventures In Marketing

Warning: The following post contains a certain amount of self-pitying and boo-hooing.

So as many of you may know, a couple weeks ago I held a promotional period wherein I made Float available for free on Amazon, which was met with rather positive download numbers, gaining roughly 12 times the amount of readers from the preceding 3 months combined in just two days. It made it into a few top 100 Free lists on Amazon. When the weekend came to a close, I was ecstatic.

But then Monday came, and nothing else happened. I was hoping for a few straggler sales to trail, or at least a handful of positive (hell, even negative) reviews. But nothing. What went wrong? Whatever it was, I wasn't going to accept it. In my desperation, I turned to utilizing Facebook ads. At a low-risk cost, I was able to target Float to a specific audience, only paying when a user clicked on my ad, capping at a predetermined daily budget. Of the nearly 45,000 people my ad was shown to, only 39 people clicked on it. And none of them got themselves a copy, even when priced at the lowest possible rate of $0.99.

W. T. F.

Is it really that bad? Is the only positive feedback I've received just the manufactured product of obligated friends and family members? It may not be a masterpiece, but I know it is (both objectively and subjectively) better than some books I've read in print - even, dare I say, some best sellers. So what was the problem?

Then a little nugget of wisdom I gleaned from an author blog (probably JA Konrath's) came back to me: Only fans will read your stuff. No one is going to buy your material if they don't know you and your writing. When was the last time you read a book that wasn't suggested to you from a trusted source? Sure, there are a few people who actively seek unknown authors, but most of us (myself included) don't venture much past personal recommendations or national sensations.

Maybe, if I had the funds, I could saturate the market with self-paid ads for my book and grab the attention of .0001% who see it. Maybe I could hire a publicist to shove my face in front of people who don't care. But most likely, I'll need to go Tortoise and the Hare on this mother: Slow and Steady.

So, for the time being, I'm not going to focus on ads or fruitless self-promotion. I'm going to keep writing. I'm going to keep blogging. I plan on pumping out a few short stories between novels, hopefully to keep people interested. In time, with tenacity and integrity, I will build my audience one reader at a time, and see where it goes from there.

This concludes the self-pitying and boo-hooing.

Free Literature? Well, I say...

Float for free. August 18th and 19th. Amazon.

I recently enrolled my debut e-book Float in the Kindle Direct Publishing Select program, which allows me to promote my novel for a few days every 3 months. The first promotion will take place this Saturday and Sunday in the Kindle store, where I hope millions upon billions of digital readers will flock to get their greedy fingers on a copy.

Well, maybe not that many.

Sales for my book have practically been non-existent recently, but revenue isn't what I'm concerned with at this stage. Right now I just want to get it in front of as many eyes as possible, and making it available for free is a great way to do so. If you're a long-time-reader, no-Float-purchaser, this is the perfect time to check it out. Or, as my dad would type, "Czech" it out.

Oh, and tell your friends, family members, co-workers, colleagues, neighbors, teachers, distant relatives, doctors, accountants, acquaintances, local grocers, enemies, random strangers you see on the street, and that creepy dude on the bus who won't stop looking at you. You can even tell me if you'd like. I'll act surprised.

Float. Free. Amazon. 18th. 19th. Make it so.